6 Jun 2009
Should try harder!
In 2004 I led a seminar called COME OUT OF THE COMA in Milan, Italy -
40 people stared at me as I was described as a Motivation Coach from London, UK and they stared even further when I said that " I hadn’t felt motivated for 6 weeks ".
They came there to be saved, to be led to greater things – not up the garden path – not my problem, but the problem is that we think we have to be motivated all the time and power through regardless. I started working on myself way before Oprah, Aids and Life Coaching and I can tell you – there are no short cuts. Motivating yourself because you feel shit is only holding your nose over the smell, the shit remains.
Live your vision, live your dream type Life Coaching, "where do you want to be in 5 years time " only has a limited shelf life. Working on the future to take you away from the present is short changing yourself. Yes it’s great to run a marathon, or lose weight or change career. It’s good to have someone hovering over you to make sure you complete goals, we all need encouragement, and if you invest in coaching and work it, then you will receive just reward. Where I stumble with this approach is that when I ask myself where I want to be in 5 years time, the response I get is from the same ego that got me stuck in the first place. Experience tells me, having worked these methods, is that disappointment is the greatest addiction and we will do anything to get it, to employ it as a marker for failure.
Living in the urbanisation called LONDON we can’t afford to dither, we walk through red lights at crossroads or even better command attention by dodging lorries that kill at glance. When we do get to work in one piece we over-achieve, multi-task, juggle, procrastinate, chinese plate spin and work those targets in order to stay in a job.
Yes I’m ambitious, yes I want to be number one, yes I want it all. So pardon the maths – if one person wins then others fail, they go home disappointed – 
and the message is MUST TRY HARDER next time. In the 80′s I gave myself hepatitis every 6 weeks for 6 years, 6 weeks with followed by 6 weeks without. It was not until I got rebirthed that I connected with the fact that within an hour of birth I was placed in an incubator for 6 weeks, then age 6 months I developed meningitis on the spine and was placed in another incubator for 6 weeks.
and the message is MUST TRY HARDER next time. In the 80′s I gave myself hepatitis every 6 weeks for 6 years, 6 weeks with followed by 6 weeks without. It was not until I got rebirthed that I connected with the fact that within an hour of birth I was placed in an incubator for 6 weeks, then age 6 months I developed meningitis on the spine and was placed in another incubator for 6 weeks.As an adult I created chronic Hepatitis every 6 weeks. I smashed this game in 1988 at the same time as purchasing a little pocket book called LIFE WAS NEVER MEANT TO BE A STRUGGLE.
At the end of my tether with chronic active Hep B, I started the process of deeper spiritual recovery with ACIM ( A Course In Miracles ) and constant Rebirthing Breathwork to detox out my many disappointments. Once I halted the game, stopped trying to beat Hep myself, INSPIRATION replaced Ambition and finally in 1995 I gained the healing antibodies to halt liver failure. Living without struggle means letting go of a destination and allowing things to occur for the greater good. This message from school ( thankfully not from my parents ) of trying harder and forcing an issue leads to disappointment & failure. Yes you have to study to get a degree and you have to study within to obtain a degree of sanity. If you are using things outside of yourself as a security blanket you will be poorly served. Living within the mind of a survivor is a struggle of misinformation.
A champion needs to be focused and obsessive with a goal in mind, trying harder to achieve a better result. Take this mindset into the real world and you will find that enough is never enough which leads to disappointment – the great addiction. The gift of humility is required of a true champion. A good loser – when you win we all win but this insight is rarely practiced. Focusing on the journey instead of the destination works in the same way as " look after the pennies and the pounds will look after themselves". Clear the shit, release the smell of failure and breathe deeply to connect with source. Working on the future without working on the present is foolhardy. Creating goals for 5 years ahead is just another escape route, a way of delaying gratification in the present. You could be a Winner now if you choose, don’t wait 5 years – you have already made it. You survived your birth, it is pointless trying to retrieve that level of adrenalin going down the birth canal, you will never capture it. Release the struggle of demanding the universe deliver what you think you need, for you have been poorly taught.
Give up control, give up struggle but don’t give up humility and footwork.
The key to motivational thinking is giving yourself a break from it. You get down, depressed and low. It’s normal, get over it, this too shall pass. It may take 6 weeks, but hey- no rush – stroll and allow things to occur, enjoy the view. Think of all the things that have happened to you without your ego interference. You will be surprised how easy it is to give up struggle but you must be in right alignment with source and universal law. This is the only Life Coaching required to hit that goal.
You bring up a great point about the value of having long term goals. I think that I would rather focus on improving my process for completing daily my obligation and planning short term goals.
Hugh
June 7th, 2009 at 1:22 ampermalink
. . . thanks Hugo for applauding my stance – focusing on the short term goals, in my experience, creates richer reward.
Clearing a cupboard gives me more liberty than planning a World trip for 2010/11. If the World Trip happens it’s because I am practiced at clearing my decks first. As a recovering addict my only goal is not to use today, putting ALL my other goals into perspective.
theswarmite
June 7th, 2009 at 2:51 pmpermalink
Wise words. Makes much sense. Living for today; enjoying today & acheiving small goals makes more sense and takes me farther than something lofty.
As always… a most enjoyable and enlightening read!
Lafang
June 8th, 2009 at 12:45 pmpermalink