Mind, Body & Wallet

It’s ages since I’ve been to a Mind, Body, Spirit Exhibition but I always referred to them as Mind Body & Wallet. Not because they are full of hypnotic selling techniques – they are not – but purely because I couldn’t be trusted to leave the building without buying anything. One of the mysteries of recovery was to discover that one of my past traits was to lash out on the lash with a full wallet, and spontaneously make money disappear. Very Tommy Cooper. Just like that. 

 

This ended up with me in the bankruptcy court in ’84 with debts of £38,000 and assets of £3 in a Post Office Savings Account, which sent a snigger round the court. The judge was not as amused as the public gallery, as I was forced to agree with m’lud that ‘ I had indeed led an extravagant and irresponsible lifestyle’. Shamefully, it all ended up in the local paper, but the Bond Street Gym I was attending at the time read the report, and awarded me a free years membership for giving them such a laugh. It was the £3 that did it.

 

Since that time I have become more conscious over money rather than insisting that I must have dropped it, lost it or had it stolen. These were the excuses I gave myself when I was bang at it, losing the plot. But not now. Now I manage my affairs like granny did with a cocoa tin. One bank account for saving, another for holidays, this one for Direct Debit, another for what I call ‘funeral" account.

 

I even have a ‘Millionaires Account ". In the Loving Relationship Training (LRT) we were encouraged to feel what it’s like to be a Millionaire. This means saving money and then giving it away – in the street. The look on peoples faces when you stop them in the street and give them a fiver! Programmes like ‘The Secret Millionaire" offer an opportunity to give away money to people who deserve, but you don’t need 30 grand surplus to do it, two hundred quid a year will suffice. There were many times in my recovery when I’ve been surprised by the magic of surrender after action is taken, when money, a gift or opportunity, arrives from nowhere. When you think you have exhausted all avenues to finance survival, up pops the solution. Just like that.

Money & spirituality are an odd couple, but as I have always said in times of despair "there is nothing more healing than a cheque". Forget all those self help books and tapes I sucked up like a hoover at Mind, Body Spirit Festivals that I thought would fix me, it was a cheque that brought joy to my face, not mystical teachings. This has been somewhat reversed as I have gotten older but I still respect the value of paying for healing. The thousands I have invested on myself with books, retreats, practitioners and therapists have more than paid off and I really can’t understand why people moan at the cost of it all when they don’t bother to count the cost of lost mobile phones, dignity and credit card concussion after a night out getting wasted. Spending money on yourself for yourself is an act of love, not selfishness. If couples spent just 6 months in couples counselling before marriage or civil union, the divorce courts would be less jammed. Aside from this, spending on average £15,000 on one ‘special day’ to show your love to family and friends, seems ludicrous when 6 months after marriage many couples can barely show love for each other, when romance dies and bills have to be paid.

 

Kids growing up where the wallet is king but Dad is unavailable for emotional attention, is now commonplace in a work focused society, and as the Wife Swop, Secret Millionaire TV genre illustrates, money isn’t everything. Money from magical sources illuminated my recovery and kept my faith but it was unconditional love and support from others that carried me through dark times of financial scarcity. When I was willing to COMMIT myself to something, be it a personal growth training, coaching or recovery itself, money has always arrived, and on time. And that, I think – IS magic.

 

Trust, consciousness and spiritual growth is the new currency of survival and my wallet is stuffed. When you consider how much you spend on getting out of it compared to getting back on track, you may finally come out of the coma of unconsciousness and start serving yourself, not your ego.