28 Jan 2010
Home Drinkers Anonymous
We are coming to the end of January and some people are ready with their feet in the starting blocks . . . secretly thinking THANK GOD, THAT’S OVER.
No, not a 6 week month with only 4 weeks pay, or thinking the snow and biting winds have all gone till next year . . but at last I can DRINK AGAIN. Self imposed punishment is not the sole right of alkies ( . . can’t they just control themselves – like ME – is the inner clarion call of the heavy drinker. I can stop any time I like . . . like the whole of January if I want ). No problem here.
One of the myths around alcoholic acting out is that you have to drink every day to pronounce at AA " I am an Alcoholic ". Controlled drinking is the fuel of the middle classes because they drink AT HOME, unlike younger public drunks in no-go-area-shopping centres after dark. No one sees the debris, the demands and the stains under the carpet. It’s all hush, hush. If I can get to work with a hangover & function – I’ve conquered it. Some people think recovering alcoholics are smug but there is no one smugger than the person able to abstain for a month, as if this is some kind of ‘ test " of strength against previous accusations that drink is the problem. Giving up booze for a month is a piece of piss compared to pissing your pants in blackout 2 months later. January is a traditional month of review, detox and new activities to savour. For home drinkers it’s just a rest stop, as valuable as a 7 day spa break for an obese framed adult, eventually serving little purpose other than convincing the ego that you’re back in control. It amazes me when friends or clients GIVE UP booze for a period? Why? What’s the point when you can drink safely anyway?
Cutting back I can understand but cutting OUT seems to herald unseen drama in the home toilet bowl, relationship ultimatums, secret health issues that are never discussed and a believe system that thinks stopping means solving. When we grew up many of us knew that what happens in the house, stays in the house. As adults we carry this message into business where discussing domestic affairs in the office, or anything " emotional " is regarded as disdainful, inappropriate and weak. So we take this stuff back home along with a couple of good bottles or a mature malt to prove that we savour booze rather than guzzle it. If someone considers themselves overweight they go on a diet. Cutting out booze for a month is not a diet, it’s an assault course designed to deceive.
A more functional route is to discover why you need to detox and abstain for a short period and the underlying reasons why you drink at home. Once these areas are processed a period of " purposeful using of alcohol and drugs " is suggested so the individual can observe trigger points, emotional kidnap and impulsive, compulsive behavior, especially when no one is around to grass you up. It’s easy to tut-tut at late night police telly, female cat fights and lairy lads on the lash while bottles from Tesco’s lay at your feet. Home drinking is the new opium den, and no one need know about it.
Just as I finish this blog a story pops up in the UK Daily Vile website, THE middle class, right wing arse wipe that purports to support the moral high ground.
I suggest you have a drink before you read it.
